I wonder
I wonder about life, death, meaning,
when the world will stop careening,
how to find a solution to all
the world's pollution,
nature, thunder, school,
what's lame, what's cool,
boredom, joy, vanity,
if I have a shred of sanity,
magick, existence, friends,
why I should bother with cool trends,
randomness, sleep, why we never go that deep,
violence, screams of anguish, sudden silence,
perception, deception, what's inside,
why we feel the need to hide,
evil, pain, war, I mean, what could it all be for?
ignorance, innocence, hope,
how to help people with tragedies cope,
rebellion, responsibility, what's it mean to be a teen?
I wonder...
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,856 Reviews
Hmm I have to admit that I don't really see anything in this poem, you talk about how you wonder about things, but there is no real depth in it atall.
I think that you hqave some ideas here, but I think you need to grasp the reader more - make them care about these things, about what's going on with the world more.
I would suggest taking another look at the poem and see where you can make it more emotional. BUt it's up to you really...
The rhyming is good, and it dosen't seem forced so *thumbs up*
All the best,
Meevs
This looks like poetry to me. I think it should be in the poetry section.
*moved*
I love these things. I have pages in my Writer's Notebook! =)